Winds of Change (and not my fart)

First thing first. An apology is due to all those people who are crazy enough to read my blog for their daily dose of headache. So I want to apologize to all you idiots. Sorry dumb$*@$#. The long hiatus from the blogging scene has been created due to my apparent ‘busyness’ of organizing Transcend ’06, working long and hard during summers and Summit SIBM. Basically I was busy trying to look busy all this while + I am in Finance = I am too busy to write in this space.

What’s changed in the past few months are the noble values that I stood for. I have “somehow” graduated from bring a junior to a senior. All of a sudden this act along with my presence in the student’s council means that I have to act responsibly this year. It’s not like I wasn’t responsible last year. I was responsible for stolen signboards, missed project deadlines, innumerable show cause notices, body odour etc. My new avatar of coming dressed in formals having bathed, being clean shaved and done other unmentionable clean up jobs in the morning has made me unrecognizable.

What’s changed in the past few months has been heart wrenching. My class is still on a lower level than the rest of the senior batch (concerned authorities believe that we still need to move up the graduation ladder…wouldn’t blame them after taking stock of our backlogs). The short cutie from Marcom who provided us the necessary excuse to climb the stairs and go to the 3^rd floor last year aint around anymore (now you know why I have put on so much weight…anyways going upto the Marcom class doesn’t make any sense now as they generally have greater ‘pressing’ issues to deal with). In an absolute ranking junior shorty is great but in a relative ranking she doesn’t quite match upto NW. What say Lord Tuktuk?

What’s changed in the past few months is that Nikhil has moved from being a plain vanilla fish eating Mallu to a super-duper hero. He has used his Googling superpower to download new apparel from the weirdest clothing sites. Continuous exposure to Anugya Punetha….sorry Cartoon Network means that one can see him dressed as Superman after night fall (he is trying to compete with her superpower of breaking buckets with her jaw). To outbid her in the race to save the world he has even downloaded Rajnikant’s Lungi. So now “jaise hi woh lungi uthati, tumko disco dikhaati” (pardon my Hindi…translation goes like this….lifting lungi is equal to showing disco balls). What’s most surprising is that he has managed to get a ‘kundi’ in his ‘undie’. Superrrrr. Is that the word of the day of the Nik?

What’s changed in the past few months is that I have started understanding Finance. I shall not faff but state my point like a true blue financial analyst. Saket has only 1 external paper backlog (not surprisingly the subject is banking….he even failed the internal while I passed!!!! hehehehahaha). So his expenses for the same = Rs. 450. The split is: Rs. 450 = Rs. 200 for exam form fees (Fixed Cost) + Rs. 250 for per paper fees (Variable Cost). My expenses are: Rs. 700 = Rs. 200 for exam form fees (Fixed Cost) + Rs. 500 for per paper fees (Variable Cost) (2^nd backlog after banking was eco where I shall be sitting for the re exam with an eco honors grad from St. Xavier’s, Bombay!!....If Danny ducked eco then I have no business of passing it). So basically my per unit cost is = 700/2 which is = Rs. 350 as compared to Saket’s Rs. 450. This can be explained by the fact that my fixed cost per unit = 200/2 = Rs. 100 against his Rs. 200. The difference in our total per unit cost is the result of this fixed cost differential. THUS PROVED.

What’s changed in the past few months is that people have started doing Gaandugiri…..sorry Gandhigiri. Inspired by his long walk to fame in search of salt people have started taking walks early in the morning. What these people are searching for is something that is deciphered only after you notice who the participants of this Random Walk Theory are. The LHS of this theory is: Finance hottie Jaanu Amreeka (boyfriend connect) does not have a home. RHS: She’s from Bombay. There are many homeless people in Bombay (trust me….god only knows how many times my pop has disowned me). Bombay’s homeless walk a great distance every morning to go to secluded places in order to take a dump. So while on the surface people may state that they are trying to lose weight the real reason is that they are practicing the act of Gandhigiri through the noble cause of salt extraction. She’s taken Gandhigiri to such a great extent that she has even turned Sam into a true Gandhian believer. When she slapped him on his right cheek he presented his left cheek to her and said that slap me again (don’t ask which cheeks?). 10/10 on the spank scale kya Sam?

Has anything changed in the past few months? I am totally clueless but i guess that the more things change, the more they stay the same.

Totally grossed out PJ Question: Why are Rishabh and Manit forever indebted to Jaanu?
Totally grossed out PJ Answer: Kyunki un logon ne Jaanu ka namak khaya hain.